In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out.  It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being.  We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.

~Albert Schweitzer

It’s been a rough week. But that’s not what this post is about. It’s no surprise to anyone that knows me that I wear my emotions on my sleeve. It’s in my nature, it’s what I do. I get emotionally attached really easily and breaking loose from something is way out of the norm and tosses me for a loop. I feel like I lean on my friends all to often. Even though they’ll probably tell you that I don’t. Everyone tells me I’m a great listener. I’ve always been ok with sitting there just listening to someone let it go, vent, etc. I absorb it and try my best to find the good in it. Sometimes I can and sometimes I can’t. That’s life I suppose.

On the other hand I’m terrible at expressing what I’m thinking or going through. Sure, I wear my emotions on my sleeve but that’s only a visible thing. I can’t express it verbally a majority of the time. That’s where my friends come in.

This week has been a hell of a rough one and I’m not sure where I’d be right now without them. So here’s to you my friends the ones who are there for me when I need you the most.

Dave -

@tricon. Dude we’ve never met but you’re one of the only people in my life right now that I can talk to on the same level as me and leave the conversation feeling great about what we just spoke about. You’re level headed and honest and I appreciate that more than anything. One of these days I’m flying out there to visit for sure.

Thanks for the conversations and chatter. You were there for me and you know I’m there for you.

Kevin -

Your one of the few constants in my life. Whether it’s chucking a can of cashews at me or almost diving in on top of me in the pool you keep me smiling and I appreciate that more than you’ll ever know. From coach to great friend you’ve been there for me and give it to me straight and although it’s not always what I want to hear I know it’s a heartfelt answer.

Wendy -

Quite possibly one of the most amazing people in my life. You have a way with your words that is second to none. The ability to push me through the hardest things in life is something noone else but you could do and I’ll never forget that as long as I live.

Leah -

@matthewschick! Another level headed person in my life. Much like @tricon I’ve never met you but hell I feel like I can talk to you about whatever. I know I’ll get a good response back and maybe something to make me smile. Plus how could I not enjoy talking to someone who cooks dinner in a microwave oven? hehe.

Sarah -

@huddydesign! Thanks for all the chats. You keep my mind preoccupied with design stuff, athletic stuff, etc. I appreciate that more than you know. It’s that kind of chatter that I often need when dealing with the daily stress of coaching, life, etc. Noone does that better than you so my thanks go out to you for sure.

I’m sure I’ve forgotten some people and I’m sorry for that. I’ve never been really good at this letting people know I appreciate them thing. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart and as you’ve been there for me you can count on me being there for you.

Here’s to you, my friends. You deserve more than my thanks.

Don’t compromise yourself, you’re all you’ve got

- Janis Joplin

So very true. All to often I see people backing off of their dreams and putting them away for another day to never return back to them. If you’re going to passionate about a dream you need to see it through. As hard as it might be and as taxing on you and everyone around it might be. To abandon a dream is like leaving a loved one on the side of the road to walk home when you’re 1,000 miles away.

Decide. Make that choice to pursue that dream of yours. Realize it might takes days or years to complete. Whether you’re ready or not to take that leap doesn’t matter. As I tell my swimmers it’s time to “get up and go”. It’s time to attack your dream with the vigor of a 12 year old opening presents on Christmas day.

Regrets. Don’t have any. It’s your dream, noone elses. Remember this. Sure you might have people in your life that you’ll need to help you achieve your dream but they’re your support system. It’s you in this and only you. That’s why it’s a dream. Consider everything during this time period to happen for a reason. Even if it’s a step back turn it into two steps forward. Use that time to refocus your energy so you don’t have the same thing happen again.

Be passionate. If you’re not going to be passionate about achieving your dream then you have no business even starting down the path. When you’re mentally and emotionally ready to start on your way then you go. Not until then.

Never. Back. Down. There will be naysayers and those who will try and stand in your way. Sidestep them and get  a move on. Don’t let them jab and taunt you with their words and actions. They are just weak individuals who are envious of such a focused person that is well on their way to achieving something.

“When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place.”

- Author Unknown

I’ve always said to everyone I know (and they’ll tell you if you ask them) that if I could coach swimming for the rest of my life I’d be one hell of a happy person. Just coaching this team that I’ve started up has been an absolute godsend. I love being on deck, working with people, helping them get better and helping them achieve those dreams that we all have. There’s no better feeling in the world than seeing someone who has gone through so much, worked so hard, get up and go and do something incredible. That being said even a single ounce of discouragement can throw everything out of whack and it’s something that we as athletes and coaches need to stray away from.

There’s that old mantra: if you have nothing good to say don’t say it. Same applies here. If you’ve got no words of encouragement and only words of discouragement take them somewhere else. They’re not wanted or needed here. Sure there are those “let’s have a reality check” conversations but the end of those should just fire someone up even more and not have them feeling mentally soupy inside.

Encouragement should come in doses. What we as coaches need to realize that our words of encouragement can sometimes be taken and blown out of proportion and before you know it you have a headcase on your hands that will be tought to deal with if it keeps going on. I make it a point that at the end of every set I let my swimmers know that they just kicked some ass. If they didn’t kick ass we talk about why and how they felt in the water. You know, what felt good, what didn’t, etc. The last thing I need is for them to think “Oh god coach didn’t say anything, we must have sucked.” I’d rather take the time and talk about it, make corrections and really go after the next set. I find this approach keeps spirits up, keeps the swimmers at a constant “let’s kick some ass attitude.” and allows me to really focus on the good things and stay in a good frame of mind for the practice. We all have our bad days and I do my level best not to take out on them or anyone else. If I’m having a bad day they get a longer warmup so I can make sure I’m good to go and ready to give them everything I’ve got.

Sports are a two way street much like relationships. If my swimmers are giving me their best there is no reason I should not be giving them my best in return. This requires a focus and an attention to detail that was not easy to come by. It pretty much requires me to eat, sleep, breathe swimming from all aspects. Stroke work, technique, physiology and psychology as well as a number of other areas. I just don’t do it for the swimmers I do it for me as well. If I’m not having fun doing something what is the point of doing it right?

I guess what I am trying to get at is don’t let those who wish to toss mud at you get you down. Let is roll off your shoulders and get back on the block and get ready for some repeat 400 I.M.s